Grand Master Shocked to Receive USPSA Check

Ripon, WI – Newly minted USPSA Grand Master (One of only twenty two in the world) Eric Littleton said he was stunned when he opened the mailbox last Thursday and saw a check from USPSA.

Rumors
“I’ve heard the rumors”, stated an excited Littleton, “but always thought it was an ‘inside joke’ GM’s played with us little guys…”
Reaction
The Feed Ramp caught up with USPSA president and pro-wrestler Mick Foley at a recent press junket near his new Miami, FL mansion: “We’ve always had a policy to cut checks, but glitches due to previous lax policies, that’d be by Mike Void and Phil Straighter, seem to have broken the system. An investigation is underway, but I’m certain the money is long gone. We can say ‘adios’ to back payments, though this shouldn’t stop us from issuing new checks.”

Future Plans

Littleton has earmarked the $3.50 to offset the cost of travel to major matches in the 2017 season. Faced with the prospect of becoming  a professional shooter Littleton has embraced the opportunity. “Will I be the next Ben Stoeger or Bob Vogel?” he ponders…. “No, but I might be the next Max Michel and that’s good enough for me.”

Merge Duffy for The Feed Ramp